Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Wiiiiiii

Watch out world - we've got a Wii!.

The boys could not have been more excited and cute!  That is what every grandparent should get to experience.  My seven-year-old quickly figured out what it was and he jumped up so fast I thought his pants were on fire.  He grabbed Nanna and squeezed her so hard I was a little worried.  I don't know that the four-year-old got it, but he saw Mario and that was cool enough.  My two-year-old nephew was helping and he could have cared less what was in the boxes - he was just so excited that the big boys were distracted and he could tear the rest of the wrapping off all by himself.

Now most of my blog followers are close friends and family so I know the question on every one's mind is - How did your husband handle this?  We knew that it was coming so I have been working on him.  Reminding him that his children are growing up in a different era, and video games are not the luxury they were when he was young.  And trying to convince him that without giving them this experience we are setting them back.  He's a hard sell, but once he started playing with the seven-year-old and getting his butt kicked in baseball, it's been a whole new ball game.

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Happy Thanksgiving

It seems to be highly debated whether thanksgiving is a holiday that should center around family or friends.  We are a family, away from our families, so I think, thanksgiving is a time to count your blessings, where ever you are...

What I am Thankful for, 2010.
I am thankful to have grown up near grandparents who were kind, generous, and very loving.
I am thankful for parents who were not perfect, not my friend, and provided me every opportunity they could.
I am thankful for a large, crazy, loud, and loving extended family that I know will celebrate my joys, and morn my sorrows.
I am thankful for falling on my face early in life so that I might appreciate what is learned from failure.
I am thankful for finding an amazing husband who lives with passion, loves with loyalty, and without whom my life would be nothing.
I am thankful for two beautiful healthy children who fill my life with love, laughter, noise, and a crazy I never could have imagined.
I am thankful for those who are no longer here, for the moments and memories that I carry in my heart.
I am thankful for a warm house in a safe neighborhood where my children can play out back in a fort they made.
I am thankful for more food than I can eat and being home every night to cook it.
I am thankful for every day, every breath, and everyone of you reading this
Happy Thanksgiving!

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Really?

I am not sure what category this goes under, except, Really!

This morning the kids are out of school for the Thanksgiving holiday, my husband doesn't have to teach, and a lot of his clients are out of town already.  I made a plan to workout with a friend who had to leave by a certain time to get to Parent/Teacher conference.  As my grandmother always said  - the best laid plans of mice and men.

I told the boys the plan last night.  I reiterated it this morning.  At T-10 minutes I informed them that I was leaving in 10 minutes and they could get ready or I would put them in the car in their PJ', hungry, and head to the gym.

Suddenly, my husband who had been on the phone with his mom is paying attention and ready to 'help'. oh yeah.  His help, to start screaming at the kids to get their clothes on and finish breakfast.  OK, not really helping!  I'm trying to stop the yelling in the house, I'm trying to teach them consequences for their behavior, I'm prepared to let them fail in this safe non-life threatening environment....AND YOU'RE RUINING IT!

So maybe the person I should have told was my husband.  This is my fault, to change parenting strategies mid swim and not tell him.  He's still doing the breaststroke and I've switched to the back stroke.  But my husband works with children and would never yell at them, why does he yell at his own children?  I don't think he came from the screaming house, where everyone is screaming.  I know he didn't come from a strict house where you tow the line or drop and give me 20!

The funniest part of the whole thing is that everyone, except me is yelling, fighting, struggling, manipulating....so I lost it and yelled (you see how long I can stick to a new parenting strategy)
ENOUGH, NO ONE TALK FOR THE NEXT 10 MINUTES OR SOMETHING BAD IS GOING TO HAPPEN......there was silence in the house for 30 seconds, then my husbands says one thing, then another....

OK, Really!

Thursday, November 18, 2010

What I am thankful for...

So my seven year-old left for school this morning to give his presentation, What I am thankful for.  When I asked him last night what he was going to say, he said, "Oh, I know mom, I know exactly what I'm going to say, we need to take a picture of the car." A little confused I said, "OK, so what is it that you are thankful for?" The reply was just not what I expected - "Transportation!"

Teaching moment?  Re frame this?  Go with the flow?  What do you do as a mom when your expectation and their reality are so far apart?

We talked about how wonderful transportation is and how grateful I am for it, because taking the four year-old to school in a carriage, or even on a horse let alone by foot would take all day.  Not to mention groceries!

But I told him that when someone asks me what I am most grateful for, I would have to say my family.  To which the four year-old chimed in that his brother should be most thankful for him-his little brother - and he should bring his picture or bring him to school and maybe they could bring some star wars stuff and talk about that too!

Well, he finally decided that he wanted to say- of course he was grateful for his family and health - but he was also grateful for something with a seat, handlebars, pedals....can you guess?? A Bike! and he is going to talk about how grateful he is to mountain bike with his dad.

I guess we got there.....

Monday, November 15, 2010

All my Crazy

For my husband...

You need noise
I need quiet
You live out loud
I live inside

My silence hurts you
You feel dejected
You overwhelm me
and all my crazy

You need order
that's filled with chaos
I just need answers
and go inside

You live with passion
for every moment
I live with fear
and all my crazy

You are my hero
You are my love
You are my friend
You are my crazy

Saturday, November 13, 2010

The waiting game....or New Super Hero hits town.

It's been a busy week and thus I ended up at the bank on a Saturday morning.  I was writing up the deposit slips at the bank when I overheard the drive-thru customer ask the teller why it took so long, where they short staffed?  She calmly replied, well yes sir there are only two of us and there is a line inside also, I'm sorry for your wait.

I ended up having the same teller and I told her I thought she handled that very well.  She smiled, sighed, and said I guess some people don't like to wait. Yes, I replied, then as if my body had been possessed I said NO! Really, no one likes to wait.  But it's like cleaning toilets, you just do it.  And I live with three boys - there is pee everywhere, behind the toilet, beside the toilet, in places there should not be pee.  You just do it.

As if the possession had ended as abruptly as it began I suddenly realized what I just said - to strangers - in the bank!  Where the hell is my filter?  Then the two ladies both giggling and said, Thank you. You just made our day!

Well, my work here is done.  Call me freakish filterless friend!  UP UP and Away.....

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Fearlessness

Every tomorrow has two handles. We can take hold of it with the handle of anxiety or the handle of faith. (Henry Ward Beecher)

In my mind, motherhood is like taking the handlebars of the bike.  You have to take a hold of both to steer, and in doing so you always have both anxiety and faith at equal disposal.  And that to me is motherhood.  That ultimate dichotomy, you must have both.

Motherhood is such a crazy balancing act.  A friend with a college age student recounted a story about that first dreaded call from the ER and her struggle to stay calm.  A friend with a boy the same age recounted the trauma of being told her infant had inoperable cancer, only to come through with flying colors.  And of course the countless stories of unsolicited I love you's, hugs, and thank you's.

If it were all pain, fear, and doubt would we keep doing it?  It is the balance between faith and anxiety, hope and doubt, and love and pain.  We take hold of the handle bars, hold on for dear life, and navigate through each and every twist and turn.  Sometimes they are illness, injury, or tragedy.  Sometimes they are victorious, joyous, and tender.

Motherhood is the ride, the journey that sometimes let's us coast with our hands in the air and the wind in our face; and sometimes leaves us holding on white knuckled.

Friday, November 5, 2010

Thanks Courtney!

I'm not a big celebrity follower, but we only get about 11 TV channels and one of the E!  So when I really need to veg, hopefully it's Chelsea Handler and not the krazy Kardashian klan time.  I love Chelsea's sense of humor and the run down on what stupid things celebrities have done now.

So the other night she was talking about Courtney Cox and her soon-to-be X, David Arquette.  Evidently, David went on The Howard Stern show and told the listeners that the marriage dissolved because Courtney was tired of being his mother.

Hallelujah!!!

Can I just say that of all the stressors in my marriage, the one that drives me most mad is that I have a 40 year-old child sometimes.  Having to think for my husband drives me crazy.  And I guess the most maddening part of it is that if I went away for the weekend, or if I have a busy week, or a family emergency - He can be amazing!  But on a day to day basis, it's like having a third child.

Do any of these examples sound familiar?

Did you pack my bathing suit?
(he asks me as I am crawling around the van floor looking for a star wars character for a screaming child!)
If you are tired, why don't you just lay down?
(he says at 6:30 as I am serving dinner, which I will be cleaning up, after being up all night with the sick child)
What time do we have to leave for the pre-school performance?
(he says calling from work 5 minutes after you were suppose to leave)

So I say, Thanks Cortney! Thank you for not sighting irreconcilable differences.  Thank you for not saying, "We just grew apart." Thank you for telling men every where that money is not the number one cause of divorce - it's their need to be the biggest baby in the house!

Now could someone please help explain to them - sex?

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Day after Halloween Cookies

If you are anything like me, and Dear Lord I hope someone is,  because I feel very alone.  You have hid the Halloween candy, not from your children who you have screamed into submission, but yourself. 

My children know that they can only have one piece of candy a day after their healthy food.  So they ask very sweetly (pun-get it) if they can have a piece after dinner.  I however do not need to ask anyone and consequently ate a pound and a half already.  Just ask my ass.

So here is my alternative - a cookie! Much healthier than just eating seven Reece's cup straight from the bag for breakfast because they have oatmeal in them...

2c. flour
1 tsp. baking powder
1 tsp. baking soda
1/2 tsp. salt
1c. butter softened
1c. white sugar
1c. brown sugar (packed)
2 eggs
1 tsp. vanilla
2c. rolled oats
1c.+ cut up chocolate Halloween candy

Preheat oven to 350. Mix flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt with a whisk and set aside.  In a large bowl cream together the butter, white sugar, and brown sugar until light and fluffy.  Beat in the eggs one at a time, then vanilla.  Gradually add sifted ingredients. Last stir in oats and candy pieces.

Bake 8-10 minutes depending on your oven, wait to remove until firm, especially if you used lots of snickers.

That is what no one here likes and it's the only thing left by the time I get around to making these cookies!  Snickers taste better in a cookie than by themselves, M&M's are also a good choice.  Nothing in an orange package ever makes it into the cookie because it can't get past my mouth.  If I had a daughter - you guessed it, she would have been Reece. Enjoy.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

What you talkin' bout Willis!

So I am telling my age with my Must See TV line-up; Different Strokes and Facts of Life.  Who doesn't remember, What you talkin' bout Willis?

If you remember, Arnold usually said that to his brother when he was asked to do something he really didn't want to do, but I tend to use it when my husband asks me that random question in the middle of total chaos.  For example, it's Halloween day, people are coming to the house for dinner and Trick or Treat, he's spent the day mountain biking.  I've spent the day cleaning, cooking, entertaining a four-year-old, and riding the seven-year-old to get his homework done.  Halloween festivities start at 5:00 in our neighborhood - at 3:30 he's eating "lunch" I'm carving a pumpkin and still need to get two boys into costumes and myself into the shower.  That's when he chooses to ask me what I found out about changing insurance.

What you talking about Willis!!