The Squeaky Wheel gets the Grease

Our dinner discussion recently centered around certain saying we will never understand. One of my son's mentioned never understanding the saying, "They can't see the forest for the trees," I'm 50 years old. I am not sure that I understand it. At one point I thought yeah yeah I get it...someone who is only looking at this not the bigger picture. But then the fixed vs growth mindset and mindfulness movement took off and it stresses staying in the now, the moment, the trees. Now I am confused again.

Another saying that came up was "the squeaky wheel gets the grease". My kids have heard this numerous times because I have one son (like me) who will not open his mouth. Then I have one son (like his father) who can't shut up. This saying comes up in conversation a lot with my older son as I try to tell him that advocating for himself is important. Teachers, coaches, friends, parents can not help you if you do not communicate with them. 

What is the opposite saying from "The squeaky wheel gets the Grease?" What do I say to my younger son who squeaks about everything! and I do mean E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G!!! But he is in a generation, a current culture that reinforces this idea of Squeak! Squeak away! Everything you think and feel is tragic, epic, and important.

Call me old. No really, I am, it's all good. I have not found enough hard scientific evidence to confirm this phenomenon. We chickens have not produced a generation of Eagles that are far superior. It is exhausting. Having to adhere to a dress code is not a sexist antifeminine fascist regime. Baseball does not need to change the name of the Bullpen because cattle might be offended. And no one cares what you eat for every meal, how many times you workout, or every single outfit change. YOU ARE NOT AN EAGLE.

Every generation should strive to be better. To right some wrongs. Teach their children well. But that generation should also learn their history because if they do not, they are doomed to repeat it. Do we not have enough examples in history to know that powers divide so they can conquer?! We are in this together! We are all human and we have more in common than difference. We all seek to survive, procreate, and protect.

Social Media is the most Unsocial thing there is! Facebook has literally wiped out human interaction. People sit next to each other "sharing" posts instead of talking. Followers are not friends. Friends are the people who show up to help you move, watch your kids when you have the flu, or drive you back and forth to Chemo. Celebrities are human beings that WE as other human beings have decided to make an Eagle. Yet, once we make them an Eagle we get pissed that they are up there and then start hacking at their wings. God forbid those Eagle soar unlike us chickens stuck here pecking at the ground.

What is the opposite saying? How do I teach my children when to squeak and when to silence their squeak and keep moving. How do I teach my children that being a chicken is just as valuable - more valuable- than being an Eagle? Eagles are rare, beautiful, and majestic, Chickens are too. How do I know. Because I am a chicken, surrounded by chickens that I love. That astound and amaze and humble me everyday.

My 80 year-old neighbor who was in IT from the start of it all still volunteers his time to underprivileged schools that need IT services. My Aunt the life-long nurse retired to volunteer at Hospice. And so many people that I have met while working in Non-profit! Engineers that give their time to build adaptations for children's with special needs, CEO's who give their time to read resumes and give mock interviews, people who donate their sewing skills to adapt pajamas for patients at Children's hospital, the teachers that have done more than babysit my children but have pushed them harder, made them walk taller, loved them like their own!!! the list goes on and on AND ON!

Those chickens....those chickens make the world a better place. Without social media, without fame or fortune, just by being their own rare and beautiful self. This is what I strive to teach my two beautiful chickens. The world needs more chickens than it does Eagles, and being an Eagle isn't any easier than being a chicken.

SNL clip

My chicken and eagle reference is from the brilliant Poet Taylor Mali. If the SNL clip made you laugh check out his poem What Teachers Make

What a day!

For anyone with teenagers, you know how few days are - WOW! Today was one of those rare days for my youngest son. He got in the car and said - Wait till you hear about today. I held my breath for the first few minutes but it wasn't one of those days....

His day started with a power outage. OK, simple snag, right. Just getting started, next the fire alarms go off, not just once but several times leaving everyone outside for 45 minutes. The power outage did not just turn out the lights, it also blew powers strips and other items. (Uh oh) The bigger issue, whatever it was that blew up at the Elementary school across the lot sent the kids and teachers running. (so to speak) After alerting the little ones parents, they brought the remaining students over to the High School where the generators finally kicked in. They didn't have all their lights, internet, etc. But they could run the cafeteria and that's all the school district needs to keep them at school. (not the high point for my teenager) However, he was stupefied that while running on generators the cafeteria managed to make the best lunch yet.

The schedule was already modified today to accommodate presentations for all the 10th grade. The morning craziness just added to the overall destruction of a productive day. He talked more about all the people he hung out with during the fire alarm, who he talked with during the presentation, lunch on the fly, and getting the scoop during his study hall which he spends helping run passes in the counselors office. 

What is the WOW part - my son talking animatedly all the way home. He didn't grump, growl, or snark at me. He didn't get on his phone. This is truly a gift to the parent of a teenager. Several minutes of respite from being the stupidest person on earth. A glimpse back to the wide-eyed little one that wanted to tell you all about their day. A moment to remember and yet look forward because as long as these days seem, they will not last forever.

Here's to a Crazy Day!!