Friday, February 24, 2023

My poor kids!!!

 I am no better at keeping this up to date and giving my kids a written account of their childhood as I am taking pictures and giving them a photo account of their childhood - I suck!!!

My youngest is 16, lordie day,  soon to be 17. (where did the time go!) He is still set on getting into college as a D1 athlete and going into life a Professional Soccer player. Sigh.......but maybe I should go back a bit.

My youngest came out screaming and hasn't stopped. He knows what he wants and he can be relentless to get it whether it was a cookie right before dinner or a ForteNite game (thank god that phase is over), having a friend over or not taking AP classes. Tenacious! Except for studying, practicing, or working hard. Thus the reason we find ourselves where we are today. He only made Varsity soccer as a Junior and we have little to no playing time to prove it. Barely any AP classes and no extracurriculars to speak of. D1 college resume material - Zero, Zip, Zilch.

However we did make it to Cyprus last summer to see my husbands mom and family and if I had to choose someone to get delayed in a foreign country - it would be him! Because I know he would be totally OK, more than OK. Quite possibly he would end up Prime Minister before it was all over. He has charisma for days, can talk himself out of/or into anything, he is genuinely kind hearted, loving, and passionate. He is so passionate about fairness or maybe good versus evil. Turned in the right direction he and Pinky COULD TAKE OVER THE WORLD!

When this child started High School I thought for sure it would be about 5 minutes before he had a girlfriend or three. But seeing as he started HS in the midst of the Covid Pandemic he took social distance very seriously. No socializing seriously. It is hard for me to get to upset over it because the social scene has not changed since I went to HS and it is still all about drinking, getting high, and having sex. It does make me sad. It hurts my heart that neither of my kids have friends or a social life because they wanted something - different.

I am sure I am not the first parent less than satisfied with my performance. There is a list a mile long of what I wish I shoulda, woulda, coulda done better. But when my son wants to hang out with me, hugs me out of the blue, goes with me to help at the store, or talks to his Nanna or cousin Liam on the phone. I stop for one minute, take a deep breathe, say a prayer to my angels and wonder to myself - Did I get the big stuff right? 

When the boys were little I would say to them, "It's my job to keep you safe and make you a gentleman." I feel as a parent the most important job I have is teach them - show them the importance of Love. Life is all about love and that is WAY more complicated than it seems. On this journey these boys have taught me just as much about love as anyone or anything, my youngest has taught me the most.

I know I don't say it enough to him. I am so incredibly proud of the gentleman he is and the Gentleman to come. Whether the Premier League calls or not Damnit!!