Friday, May 29, 2009

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I am playing Webkinz World again. I just received the sweetest email from a friend we call Grandma saying, "What's new Ted I am waiting! Are you still writing?"

I paralyzes me. It seems too daunting this thing that I have started, writing. Telling people was the mistake, maybe I should have keep it a secret. Thinking, writing, being funny, it's too hard! Life is crazy and messy and "I don't have time"....how often we say this.

I am reminded of an interview I went to in college for a nanny position. The woman interviewing me was amazing. She started hiring nannies for people after her granddaughter was born and her daughter needed someone. She had been a nurse for 20+ years at University hospital and I just remember her telling me this story.

"Darling, try not to say "I don't have time", and this is why. I do not need to work. I have never needed to work. My husband does very well, we live in a very upscale neighborhood, I work because I want to. My job as a nurse is not easy. I see people who are dying everyday. When my friends call and say, "Let's play tennis, let's have tea, we're going shopping in NY." That's when I say, I am so sorry- I do not have time. Life is to short to waste, make your mark not regrets.

It paralyzes me. It is easier to stop, quit, throw in the towel and say I DON'T HAVE TIME! What am I doing? Cleaning, watching TV, cooking, sleeping, chatting away to a girlfriend about my husband.

I am making regrets and life is too short. I've dreamed of being a writer since before I could write - ask my sister! So this may not be the most hysterically funny, moving and clever piece of work, but I'm still here Grandma....

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