The count down....vacation part 3

So Friday is the big day. We will head out on vacation should we all still be alive. My husband is really pushing my buttons to the enth degree. If he keeps this up he may be riding on top of the car like the grandma in National Lampoons Vacation. (Yes, I know she was dead!)

Besides my husband losing is ever loving mind I have a 6-year-old with an ear infection and possible strep throat and a three year-old that has stopped using the potty. Do you see now why I don't look forward to vacation!

To top this all off, TMI ALERT (this subject matter may not be suitable for the male audience - especially my father) I forgot to finish half a pack of birth control pills. I never forget my birth control pills - all hope may be gone.

I'm about to have a period which I haven't done in three years, that can't be good. Imagine if you will Mount St. Helen's. My body is already starting to morph into something out of a science fiction movie. I'm so bloated everything from my earlobes to my ankles looks like it's about to pop open. Nothing sounds good to me but chocolate covered chocolate and fast food grease. Anytime my children say, "Mom" I start seething and snarl back "WHAT NOW!" then immediately start crying.

My neighbor stopped her car in the middle of the street as the boys and I were walking yesterday. She rolled down the window and asked if I was good.
"Yes", I replied.
"Are you sure?" she said.
"Yes" I said again starting to feel the snarl coming on, "Don't I look good?"
"I was outside yesterday on my deck, it sounded a little chaotic at your house." She said with hesitation, then let the car start to roll away ever so slightly. I have a feeling the snarl that I was trying to conceal was working it's way to my face because she suddenly got a rather terrified look on her face. Almost like she didn't know whether to floor it or grab the boys. She chose to run.
"Glad you are good, have a nice walk! See you after vacation."
Scaredy cat! My bark is worse than my bite, I hope....this is going to be a loooonnnggg trip.

Stay tuned!