Thursday, July 9, 2009

You know your a parent when...

I recently had one of those moments when it became very clear that I have fully arrived into motherhood.

It was 11:30 p.m. and after a very long day I was heading up to bed. As usual, I stopped in the boys room to make sure everyone was in a bed, semi-covered, and kiss them goodnight. I leaned over my littlest who is still wearing diapers to bed and smelled poop. Being exhausted and hoping I was just smelling myself I started to sniff. Armpits? Feet? Shirt? Wastebasket? Laundry basket? Nope! It is the kid.

Now maybe some of you have had this dilemma before and because you are a stellar example of what a mother should be you scoop up your toddler and change the diaper with loving care. I chose to duck out of the room and deal with it in the morning, or so I thought.

When my husband arrived upstairs a little later I quickly said from my cozy corner of the bed, "I've already checked on the boys." I was hoping to avoid him going anywhere near the bedroom. You see, my husband has the nose of a bloodhound. He can smell everything except himself from 200 yards. I knew that if he stepped foot in that room the jig was up. He would never change the sleeping child's diaper, but he would also never let me rest until I did. He went in anyway.

Like a possum, I tried to play dead. He called my name three times and huffed around the room. Finally, standing over me he said, "Are you really going to let your baby sleep in a poopy diaper?" Yes. I've never claimed to be Mother Theresa. Wait she wasn't really a mother mother, was she? "FINE!" I grumbled and got out of bed this was not going to be easy.

With my husband looking over my shoulder with a flashlight (Goodness knows why?) I carefully enter the boys room. I grab a diaper and three wipes. I am armed and dangerous. A mother on a mission - change a diaper without waking the child. Dare I say, it went down with the stealth precision of a Navy Seals operation. I was so pumped when the child simply rolled over and went back to sleep that I had to go downstairs to celebrate with a glass of wine - I have arrived!

1 comment:

  1. WTF!? Are his arms broken?? I can't believe he wouldn't do it!? You may have arrived to motherhood, but it's still 1964 in your house! Tell him it's time he started carrying his share of the load! Being daddy is not just about taking them to the park for a while!