That's not illegal. That's Adulting.

 My oldest son checks all the oldest son boxes. He is hardworking, rule following, a straight A people pleaser.  He has spent the last few Saturday's working for different clients of my husband's who just needed some muscle. Odd jobs around their house or yard.

Yesterday at the track meet some fellow runner asked what he was up to tomorrow. He said, "I'm staining a deck." To which one Freshman replied WHY....and thus the conversation ensued.

My Son - "Well they are paying me and college is expensive.

Freshman - "Do you have to pay for college?"

random runner - "You're an idiot!"

Freshman - "I mean aren't your parents paying for it?"

My Son - "I have to help pay for some of it, but yes, my parents are helping I got some scholarships."

Freshman - "So do you like doing like - work?"

My Son - "Well maybe not all of it, but yes I enjoy being outside, landscaping, mowing, digging stuff up, cutting stuff down."

Freshman - "Hmm? I don't think I would like that? Do you like staining decks?

My Son - "I don't know, I'll tell you after tomorrow."

Freshman - "Wait what?!

My Son - "I don't know I've never stained a deck before."

Freshman - "ISN'T THAT ILLEGAL?!"

random runner - "Shut up idiot!"

Freshman - "I mean isn't that like false advertising or something?"

I couldn't help at this point bust out laughing and I interrupted my son's story to proclaim rather loudly - That's not illegal - that's adulting! My son laughed and said that was a better come back than what he said.  But he did shake his head and admit that perhaps I had a good point.

He told me the exact moment at the start of this his Senior year he realized everyone it making it up as they go along.  It was the first day of school and he is the first and only student to take their new Engineering curriculum all 4 years. That meant that this year would be an Independent Study.  Mr. Glazer is not only his favorite teacher but the only teacher he has had all 4 years and the one who wrote several of his college recommendation letters.

My son said to me recently, when I walked into Engineering class the first day this year it was actually the second year students class time. Mr. Glazer got them all settled down and then said to me, well are you ready for this? I was so nervous after all the stuff we had to do to get this approved. I wasn't sure if the Principal and Superintendent were coming back to watch me. I just wasn't sure how this was going to go.

Then Mr. Glazer slapped me on the back and said, Ok. So you can take over the lab and work there. Good Luck kiddo - go figure it out.

I just stood there for a minute stunned. I said thanks, but I thought, Shit (sorry mom) I am really doing this all by myself. I gotta make this sh-stuff up. After about a week I realized that's what all the teachers are doing? They are making it up! Everyday! OMG was that eye opening.

Funny. As a parent the events that you think will impact your kids the most sometimes have no effect and others you may not know about at all - change their life.  This independent study has been fantastic for him. Not because he learned so much about Engineering (he did learn he HATES coding) but because he learned so much about himself, about life. He really needed to know especially after COVID that we all do the best we can everyday. No one has all the answers, no one is perfect, and Hell to the Yes we make it ALL up as we go along.

I know the Freshman who he was talking to and the random runner with all the snarky comments. I know that one of them will be OK the other one, well, he may learn manners eventually. Or not. But what I do know is that life will also give them the opportunity to learn that adulting is not something you can google, or watch on YouTube. It's just figuring it out.