Sunday, December 22, 2013

A new twist on an old classic...

Twas the week before Christmas and all through my house, every creature was fighting including the mouse.  Their stocking were dirty and thrown without care, no one thought ole St. Nicolas wouldn't stop here.

The children are wrestling and no one's in bed, one just got hurt and one yelled $#!@ head.  But dad is at work and mom's little night cap, has settled her in for a long winter's nap.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter, someone should really go and see what is the matter!
Then right threw a window it flew like a flash, it tore off a shutter and threw up the sash.

But what to my neighbors sore eyes would that be? but my children screaming like Irish banshees.
I knew in a moment we must look a hot mess, so I dashed in the house to get myself dressed.

Now Jones, and Foxes, and Curry and Wales, now Richards and Norton and Bertke and Gails.
Go back to your porches! Go back to your homes!
There's nothing to see here just leave us alone.

And then in a twinkling I heard in my ear, the screaming of each of my children so near.
As I grabbed my head from that terrible sound, they started again and both hit the ground.

Their eyes little slits and their faces red as a rose, and the snot pouring out of each of their nose.
Their mad little mouth draw drawn into a crease, neither one going to give up or release.

They were both crying and yelling, "Where did you throw the Elf!"
That I just had to start laughing, in spite of myself.

Then I spoke not a word but went straight back inside, to find the damn Elf and make him go hide.
Then using my finger to signal like this, (not THAT signal) they both came to me Alexander and Chris.

Then I sprang into action and sent them to bed, and they flew up the stairs afraid I'd lose my head.
But they heard me exclaim as they ran out of sight - "If you don't shape up soon ther'll be NO Christmas night!!!"

All characters appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.


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