Bad people don't need a law in place to break it....

Even though I am sometimes accused of living under a rock I am aware of what is going on in North Carolina, Mississippi, and now evidently, Target. Potty talk is all the rage.

At an aftersschool event the other day I went to use the restroom.  As I was washing my hands a mother said to me "I'm just sick over what's happening at Target, aren't you?"  I was so confused. I wasn't at Target, was I? She must have seen the deer in the headlights look on my face because she said - "You know about the bathrooms." Crickets, crickets, crickets

She went on, as if I was provoking her with my blank bewildered stare. "Well, I just think now anyone who wants to go into the restrooms and {start whisper} take pictures {end whisper} can!"

Wait, seriously? Am I on a hidden camera? Do you think that bad people have waited decades for someone to change the law so that they could break it?

I did my best to stop gawking because at this point I was afraid she would call 911 thinking I had gone brain dead during the conversation. So I smiled and said - that doesn't worry me at all - and I started to walk away.

She was polite, she said "Oh, OK, so you don't worry about it" or something to that effect because that stopped me. Hell yes I worry! I worry about my children, your children, human kind in general.
Bad people are Bad people and they do not need a law in place to break it, or a Target to stalk.

Does being Trans-gendered make you Bad?  NO!  I really can't go on and on about it, because I just don't think this is something that is all that complicated.  It's a restroom, there are stalls, I don't watch other people take a dump - do you? Then what do you care what parts they have or use or need.

But I will say - WASH YOUR HANDS!!

Hey - I got one right!!

If you haven't signed up for Curious.com I highly recommend it. And this morning it proved I was right - about chores! My children have recently been on a campaign to get rid of their chores. For many reasons, none of them new.

I hated ironing. I still do. Perhaps because growing up my father was a Real Estate Agent. He dressed up everyday. White shirt and tie. Also being that he was OCD it meant that he didn't just have 9-10 dress shirts, he had 100's. Literally.

As punishment for goodness knows what because I rarely got in any trouble (insert hysterical laughter here) my mother, who must also hate ironing, would send me to the basement to iron.  Our basement was a dungeon. It was not finished like other families I knew. It was concrete and storage and a hole in the ground where the bathroom should have been. It had those small slits that were suppose to be windows, 6 ft off the ground. Great during a tornado but when the house fell in around you - how the hell were you suppose to get out! It's not like we could live down there for days there wasn't any food or water - well except for the hole in the ground where the toilet was suppose to be.

Ironing in the dungeon was like that scene out of Johnny Dangerously. (If you have no idea what this means, go to Netflix and watch it, the movie is hysterical.) There were not a few white shirts, there were huge, over sized laundry baskets overflowing with white shirts. Had they been any other color it would have looked like the prison laundry room. Unpainted concrete block walls, overflowing laundry bins everywhere, enough dirty underwear to bury you alive and that was just Dad's. Don't get me started on what laundry for five kids looks like. Oy vey!

Why then do I make my children do chores? Because spending that much time in the dungeon ironing taught me a valuable lesson - what doesn't kill you makes you strong enough to win an arm wrestling contest against your eight grade teacher. That's a story for another time.....thank you to Curious.com

Give the gift of chores

Take out the trash! With so much pressure for children to build their resumes and get into good colleges, household chores are a thing of the past. In a recent survey of 1,000 U.S. adults, 82% reported having to perform household chores as a kid. But only 28% say they require chores of their own children! Other priorities--like learning new languages, playing varsity sports, and joining clubs--have take precedent. Many parents apparently view time spent on chores as wasted. This is ironic since, according to decades of research, chores are actually a proven indicator of success--emotionally, academically, and professionally. One study followed a group of children through their 20s, and found chore-performing kids to have good relationships, be self sufficient, and achieve early career success. In other words, parents who do everything for their children are actually doing less for them. Hey kids, where is my newspaper!?

Learn more about this Curio:
The Wall Street Journal: "Why Children Need Chores"
The Australian Business Review: "Children need chores to teach mastery, responsibility""

Parent like a Pirate -the T Notes

I recently read a book called Teach Like A Pirate by Dave Burgess and loved it so much and took so many notes (not really that unusual) I thought I would share them (the unusual part). My thanks to the Pirate Dave for a wonderful and inspiring book. Enjoy.

Parent like a Pirate - T Notes

menu for the week

Add your own pictures - please!

Menu for Week of April 25, 2016

Happy 13th Birthday to my "Baby" boy!!

This dinner was a HIT!

Does anyone else ever feel like Babe Ruth when they find a dinner where there is nothing left?!

It hasn't happened in so long and the funny thing is we have been having Taco Tuesday for so long that everyone looked at me like I was nuts for putting anything else on the table last night.

Ahhhhh, but I did and they were glad and it was all gone. I will not go into detail about the ways I changed it, because that makes me crazy when people write, I liked this but I changed this and this and this and.....Then you made up your own thing!

Enjoy - Happy Hump Day!

Crispy Ginger Pork with Cucumbers from Woman's Day Magazine

Sports Parents

In light of the upcoming Soccer tournament weekend I thought I would re-post some blogs on not being "that" parent.  My opinion - Shut up. Your kid knows you are there and that is good enough. Don't coach, don't cheer, and especially don't yell. Just shut up and enjoy.

A view from the bleachers

The only words you should say!

Today show segment

Standardized Testing Time

A must read

Menu - It's BACK

Menu for the Week of April 4, 2016

What is all this for??

Did you ever have one of those moments where you wonder- What is all this for, anyway?

That what this year of better blogging is alllll about.

" I'm not so good with advice but..."

"can I interest you in a sarcastic comment instead?" Friends - Chandler Bing

I have always felt more comfortable writing than talking....where I can read, reread, look at it, say it out loud, fix it, revise it, edit it, or DELETE it. When faced with an emotional or confrontational conversation I tend to either put both feet in my mouth or clam up pretending I never heard the comment.

When I was turning 40 it was one of the things that I wanted to magically appear after I blew out the candles on the birthday cake.  I would make a wish for the perfect prelection and PUFF. Never again would I suffer from the extreme embarrassment of saying something really stupid after someone reveals something personally emotional or upsetting. Or worse looking like a deer in headlights. Having no no response at all except for my mouth hanging open.

It didn't happen.  But I have been working really hard to think before I speak even if it takes me a little longer or a few try's to get it right.

The other night at the soccer field was no exception. I usually workout while the boys are practicing. We pay a lot of money for someone else to coach soccer I see no reason for me to micro-manage them. On top of the whole-not knowing a thing about sports.

Any who, one of the Dad's was also walking and we fell into step together and conversed about the team and the hope of a much better season and Spring Break.  We discussed our non-vacations and frustration about having a game on Easter Weekend.

I tried to say I shouldn't be too upset seeing as we are not deeply religious people, but for me it's more about respecting our time as a family.  I appreciated the coach we had one year that said his order of importance was "Faith, Family, School, then Soccer." This Dad said he agreed. Not that he was deeply religious either considering he was one of the many boys hurt by the church scandal.

You know how you hear something, but you do not hear it? It's like, Wait What? I wasn't ready for that - for so many reasons. We were walking around the pitch, it was a Tuesday night, and this is a guy. I personally have rarely seen that level of vulnerability, honesty, or openness from a man.

I just nodded. We kept walking. I offered my opinion on the Church's more than Epic Fail in handling the scandal.  My inability to support a church of all places that could ruin lives in such a heinous way and take no responsibility. It's an emotional subject - obviously. I didn't want to get so emotional that I said something stupid or worse - hurtful. But I also somehow wanted to I guess acknowledge his pain and apologize. I just wasn't sure how.

His response was wonderful. He said it's not that I don't have faith in God, it's that I no longer have respect for the institution.  Wow. After all that he has been through, to be able to separate the good from the bad.  It's admirable. Makes me look like I kinda threw the baby out with the bath water, A?

To this Dad - and to all the men that were so horribly wronged by the very institution that was suppose to love, guide, and protect them.
I am truly sorry.

MUST Try Dessert

You will not regret this!!

Strawberry Crack