Our answer to New Year's Resolutions

What was our family's answer to the craziness of New Years Resolutions??

365 Resolutions

Yep. That's right for the woman who swears them off and despises them, my children's response was

"Let's make one for Everyday of the year!"

Enjoy our January calendar

Hello New Year....Goodbye old year

I have never been one for resolutions even from a very young age.  Having grown up Catholic I knew making a resolution that I was suppose to keep all year was fruitless - I could never make it through Lent. That's all of what 40 days?

New Years used to get the blame for my melancholy mood that followed all through January also. With Auld Lang Syne and all the "Remember when" and "Best of the Year ????".  I was a hot mess by January 1st.

Just like my children who have yet to cry Uncle regarding Santa Claus I was not willing to say out loud, "I know he is not real". My mom just did it for me. She outed him when I was 12. It was the saddest Christmas ever and it went downhill from there.  

Then I was married on December 23rd.  The holidays had been renewed especially after we added children to the family.  But one thing remained, the dreaded New Year's Eve. It was still the one thing about the Holiday's that could put me in a solid funk. Debbie Downer. The party pooper. 

Maybe this will be the year - I will find the secret to New Year's Happiness.  I will make a resolution to not be the New Year's Downer.  I will embrace the Year in Review with folly and mirth. (Should be easier given that Trump is running for President)  I will make resolutions with utter abandonment.

#532 - set alarm clock to "Wake me Up before you GO GO"

#533 - wear the wrong day of the week underwear ON PURPOSE

#534 - eat ice cream for breakfast once a month (ok maybe just on Birthday)

I will eat every lucky and prosperous food on the list! Grapes at Midnight. Black eyed peas and Collard Greens, Sausage and Sauerkraut. Soba Noodles. Vasilopita. and Pickled Herring! Ok maybe not pickled herring.....

This year I will make the New Year Merry and Bright for sure! Well at least I think I will, that would require getting out of bed, getting in  he car and driving through traffic, going to the store with the rest of the universe and fighting over the last bag of Collard greens and trying to find black eyed peas. And that is only if I don't bother to shower, dress, put on make-up, not to mention wake up my children.

Ugh this is getting more and more complicated and it is already New Year's Eve Day.

NEW PLAN - I will make a plan for next year! And it will be awesome.

Happy New Year to all and to all a good night. (I'm just going to stay in bed)

Are you sure you've been married 20 years?

Wow. It is a sobering moment to say out loud, I have been married 20 years.

Even though my children are twelve and nine the concept of time is still lost on them.  Talking about the 1990's might as well be the 1890's because they can not conceptualize the world that long ago. When mom and dad were other people.

I have a hard time looking back at those other people.  After 20 years they seem to be fading away. It's hard to remember a time before soccer, basketball, school, and life.  What the hell did I do with all that FREE time!!

My husband has been asking clients for months what he should do for our anniversary, where we should go to eat, and how should we celebrate.  His clients range in income so some of the answers were awesome because they totally sent him into a tailspin.  Like surprise her with a weekend in Paris.

So the other day when I took the boys up to the fitness center to workout, people were stopping to say Happy Holidays and Happy Anniversary.  By the time we left both boys had heard this 20 times. (HA typed that without thinking!)  When we got in the car my twelve year old looked at me and said, "Are you sure you've been married 20 years?"

Now granted, I am not known for my math acumen and frequently rely on my children to handle a math question, especially in public. (Including, How old am I now?) So his question did not strike me as all that odd.  I told him Dad and I were married in 1995 - and it's 2015 you do the math. and double check me.

Yes, I really have been married 20 years.  It's no wonder my children struggle with the concept of time.  I am baffled at that statement.  Where did the time go?  How is it even possible?  The days sometimes felt like forever while the months went by in a blink.  And suddenly here you are, 20 years later.

How should it feel?  No married couple ever gave us that insight.  They said, Don't go to bed angry, Always kiss goodbye, and make sure to keep a Date Night. (None of which we've yet to follow) But no one told us what this would feel like.

I think it feels like - school.  I'm always learning, there are a lot of pop quizzes, and a few major exams.  You have to study every day because you never know when you will be called on.  Your son needs surgery, your friend is dying of cancer, your furnace is broke, your fired, your mom needs surgery.....

Those moments when you can feel your heart in your throat, your eyes start to sting, and you wish it was as simple as three sharpened no. 2 pencils. And it usually is. Somehow you make it through. Together. Maybe this is what it's suppose to feels like, school.  Only you get to sit next to your best friend everyday, there are no demerits for PDA, lunch is way better, and if you get stuck you can ask for help.

(Now it doesn't seems so dumb that he copied off me on the marriage test during Pre-Cana.)
Happy Anniversary Hubbie

Sports of all sorts

The last two weeks have been - exhausting. 

My twelve year-old son was trying out for a coveted spot on the Junior High Basketball team.  

While we have told our son, over and over again, he is a sum of the whole not merely any one single accomplishment this truly was a HUGE deal.  There are easily 100+ boys going for 30 spots on the teams.  Tryouts lasted technically three nights, but five if you count the two open gyms.  Some of these boys worked with a trainer prior to the tryout and some have been focusing on just Basketball since third grade.

Perhaps I should have prepared my son a little more before the first open gym but I didn't want him going in so nervous that he was a hot mess.  In the few weeks leading up to the tryouts while we were still in soccer season I did mention causally a few times that he may need to go pick up a basketball. My husband was a little less subtle. Surprised?  

That first open gym I couldn't even drop him off because I wasn't home so I arranged a ride to the gym and I drove the two boys home. The other boy I took home was very talkative, which was unusual for him, and my son was almost mute.  After we dropped the boy off my son literally exploded with emotions.  I let him vent, I took the long way home, and I told that even though they called it an open gym it was very much a part of the tryout process.  He was miffed, but now motivated. At least he picked up a basketball.

The next night of tryouts as I drove him up to school I asked him to remember that this should be fun. Not knowing one single thing about basketball I couldn't give him any fundamental advice, so I was left with emotional stuff.  I told him to stay out of his head.  "I don't care who is on your team, who gets the ball or how much, who is watching you and who isn't. Just play ball. When you start to think to much - STOP! Play ball." I'm sure my husband would have been rolling his eyes, sighing, and possibly said shut-up.

I didn't play sports really, I was a dancer. I was forced to play softball once (I was 9-it lasted two weeks) and took tennis lessons once (they begged me not to come back).  I played volleyball and was a cheerleader in Junior High and that was enough for me. Needless to say, I am so proud of my sons it is hard to find the words.  I've often told them, they have inspired me to be a better person by showing me what handwork, commitment, and perseverance really means.

But like I said, I can not coach my kids in sports but I could teach them a soubresaunt or passe. 

Or better yet I guess, I can teach them how to stay out of their head.
Something about that sentence just sounds wrong.

It's officially Fall - Welcome Baby Lakis

Soccer is over for fall!! Halloween has come and gone. Basketball tryouts are here. (YUCK!) And it is Election day. Which means no school, friends over to play, and a perfect fall day here in the Midwest.  The temperature is just right, the sky is that amazing blue that reminds me of the first time that I glimpsed the Aegean Sea, and the leaves are all shades of yellow, orange, red, purple, and brown. 

This is my favorite season. I can not help but collect leaves every time I take the dog for a walk. Sometimes I actually get them into a book to press, mostly they collect around my house until they turn brown, mostly I forget and they turn to dust in the pocket of every jacket in the house.

The boys have been outside most of the day either playing on the neighbors trampoline, throwing the football, or creekin'. The dog is happy to just lay in the sun at my feet while I search the Internet randomly as thoughts pop in my head.

My husband's family has a new addition, born just two days ago, we received the pictures via Skype of the tiniest human being I have seen in quite a while.  It makes me swoon for just moments of those first days after the baby is born when your faith and hope in the universe is at it's highest.  After nine long months of cooking the timer buzzed and the wait is over.  You get to touch, feel, smell, hear, feed, and finally look at the miracle product.

With a nine and twelve year old it feels like those days are SO far away. When your children are that small the days feel likes weeks, sometimes months but the years still fly by. It's hard to explain to anyone what will happen to them after they have children. Each one of us will take a very unique journey that is for certain. But when I was very pregnant with our second child and waddling through the grocery store with a toddler in tow I remember a beautiful older woman stopping me.  She asked how far along I was and squatted down to talk with my son.  Then she looked me dead in the eye and said "The days are long, the years are short, and soon this will all be over. My one wish now is that someone had told me - don't wait for grandchildren. Enjoy your children."

In those first days at home with a newborn, a toddler, and a sick husband those words ran through my head one day. I laughed out loud thinking "HOW?" I was exhausted. I was alone. I was totally overwhelmed. and then it dawned on me. All those years I spent with my Grandmother (we were best friends) when she was overwhelmed - we went shopping. We ate ice cream for lunch. We drove an hour to buy Muss Melons or 30 minutes to find a McDonald's. Or we just drove around looking for "something, I will know it when I see it."

I remember that day. I put my one week old in the baby carrier, the toddler in the car seat, and left my husband in bed.  We went to a McDonald's with a Playland. We ate fries and ice cream for lunch and no one was worse for wear.  So that's my best advice to new parents. old parents, and especially overwhelmed parents. Channel your grandparents - and spoil the kids for a little while. No one will be worse for wear.

It's bad to find out the news....by making the news.

No news is good news, the saying goes. As a substitute aide and health aide in the schools this is one of many sayings that are near and dear to me along with but not limited to: Let sleeping dogs (and children) lie.  Beware of Greeks (and students) bearing gifts.  If they are quiet, they are up to something. and of course Fever Free for 24 hours before they return!

After enjoying the long weekend together with friends, movies, sleepovers, pizza, and too many late nights no one was looking forward to school on Tuesday. Not even me. I headed back with my youngest son because I was subbing at his school.  This would be a new position for me, it was someone I had never subbed for before and those days are always rough.  There is no learning curve for a sub - you are jumping into someone else's shoes and you need to hit the ground running. Which we did not. My son was throwing a fit about shoes (apropos) and I got to school about 20 minutes late and totally flustered.

But the first hour was without students so as I took a breath, acclimated myself to the Aide's schedule and ran errands and copies for the teachers. Just as I was feeling like I might be able to handle the rest of the day the announcement came; "Teachers and staff please evacuate the building immediately. Evacuate just as you would for a fire. All staff evacuate the building."

Being without a class I was almost the first out of the building.  I watched as teachers and students calmly and quietly filed out of the building and into place. Teachers counted and shh'd while other staff members took up their posts and made radio contact with administration.  There was a lot of speculation among the crowd both from students and adults. I could hear both saying things like "Do you smell smoke? I do!" or "Do you think there was something wrong with the building?"

It was literally less than two minutes before we heard two short whistles and the Principal shouted to teachers to get students to the very back of the property but to stay as far away from the building as possible. One teacher right away said "It sounds like we are getting what's been going around the state." What the Flu?? For this no-news watching person it would be another 10 minutes before I was told there was a bomb threat called into the school.

Now, Let me say that having a background in safety, my first clue that it was not a fire was that there were no fire trucks pulling up to the school only 6 police cars. As we walked the students to a location a safe distance from the building, I could see that there was an ambulance parked in a cul-de-sac that butts up to the property, but not in plain site of the students.

It was a beautiful fall day - a little chilly if anything but a great day to be outside.  Let's keep it that way.  Every teacher, aide, custodian, cook, and volunteer there focused their attention on the students. It became clear we were going to be outside for quite a while and staff was briefed quickly every 20-30 minutes and the message was consistent. Teachers started games of all kinds. I saw popcorn, hot potato and simon says.  They practiced vocabulary or math facts by scrimmaging other classes. Those of us not with a class jumped in wherever we could, finding tissues for the bloody nose, band aids for a splinter, and soothing words for a tummy ache.

I would not find out until later that night that we were one of 7 schools that day that received a bomb threat and many more around the country in the past weeks.  What is this all about- Fear? Probably. Many parents came up to school and pulled their children out saying I just want to hug them. I get that....but what if that is exactly what someone intended. Get as many people there as possible, and then reek havoc.  Is the intent that our schools are not safe and they can't handle a situation like this?

Let me tell you from what I saw that day and every other day - those teachers are the front line.  They may not be sworn in but they take their job seriously. To TEACH and PROTECT.

The need to hug your children close when you hear of a mass shooting, a natural disaster or bomb threat will never go away. I know. My mom called me when she heard.  I just want you all to know, as a parent and a substitute I want nothing more than to send your child home to you everyday a little better and a little brighter than they were this morning. And I will do whatever it takes to make that happen. I Promise.